How to Choose a Collaborative Divorce Coach

Collaborative divorce offers couples the ability to reach a fair divorce settlement while resolving their differences in a civilized manner. Both spouses along with their attorneys sign an agreement that requires them to negotiate the divorce process through respectful meetings. Couples often choose to use professionals to assist them during this time. These experts often include financial advisors, child specialists and divorce coaches.

Selecting a Divorce Coach That is Right for You

Divorce can be one of the most painful experiences and having the right coach to guide you along the way can be a huge asset. Finding the right person to be there, providing moral support may help you retain your sanity and give you hope for the future. Most divorce coaches are psychologists or marriage and family therapists who are trained and licensed professionals. Their primary goal is to focus on the issues at hand and work out a solution that is fair to all parties involved.

Choosing the right individual may be hard for some people because they are emotionally frail during divorce. Keep in mind that any professional you work with should be someone you trust and feel comfortable with. Seek out individuals who you feel are a good match with your personality. Remember that these people will be privy to all kinds of personal information and you must be able to confide in them. If you are both “Type A” personalities, this may not be a good match.

How the Divorce Coach Works With the Child Specialist

You may think that divorce is horrible for you, but what about the children? This can be a major source of stress in their young lives, from which they find it difficult to recover from. The role of the child specialist and divorce coach can help the family by communicating important fears the child has and communicate these back to the parents. Children are often afraid to speak up and share their point of view. Some of these issues can include:

• Focusing on the present—No child wants to hear their parents make allegations of what the other parent did in the past that contributed to the breakdown of the marriage. Once the spouses have agreed to seek a divorce, they need to focus on the future and embark on a new path for a positive future.
• Your decisions will greatly affect my life—While the parents are fighting it out over child custody and visitation, remember that the decisions you make will have a big impact on the lives of your children.
• Too much information—Children don’t want to know what new person you are dating. Leave the kids out of your social life and focus on them.
• It’s not my fault—Remember to reassure your children that the divorce is not their fault and that both parents still love them very much.
• Don’t flake out on me—Children are already scared because their life as they once knew it is over. Change is always frightening and they rely on their parents to keep their word. If the parent makes a promise to pick u the child from school and spend the day together, they should keep their end of the bargain.

When to Get Legal Assistance

Collaborative divorce can be a positive experience for all family members. Each party should retain their own legal counsel to give them advice during this process. Family law attorneys who are experienced in this new method will be a valuable resource while looking out for your best interests at the same time.