When to Get a Divorce: Making the Decision

Deciding when to get divorce is very difficult, especially if you thought you were living the dream, married with kids, and a perfect job. What happens when that ideal life you thought you were living begins to crumble? What if now, it just seems impossible to go on with your once happy marriage?  

Knowing When to Get Divorce?

Whet should I get a divorce? This is the pressing question that every husband and wife in a troubled marriage struggles with. Unfortunately, it’s not an equation that can be solved with a so-called formula. It never is easy. There are a plethora of complex reasons why people consider a divorce. Each case is subjective and based on personal experiences, the nature of relationship and its problems, and other factors. 

Of course, the answer to any divorce-related question is indeed personal, but everyone can reach that point in their lives wherein going back will just prolong the agony of a fairy tale gone bad. Here are some questions to consider when deciding to get a divorce: 

  • Does every little thing, no matter how ordinary, end in a fight between you too? Does every conversation end up with the both of you screaming at each other? This is obviously an indicator of failed communication in your marriage.  
  • In your conversations, do either of you constantly refer to the past’s hurtful experiences? Is there still a sense of respect when you’re together? 
  • Have each of your life’s goals changed? Do you still dream of achieving your dreams together? Do you feel that your partner is still supportive of your personal hopes and dreams? 
  • Are you still financially compatible? Do you still agree in the way money is brought in, saved, or spent?
  • Are either of you experiencing abuse? (verbal, physical, emotional) Is there alcohol or drug use?
  • Has anyone been unfaithful?
  • Are religious and moral values still upheld?
  • Are you encountering sexual incompatibility? Is the attraction still there? 
  • This next question is an important one – Will a divorce make you happier? If you see yourself happier and freer to go on with your life, then you should probably get a divorce. Determine the root cause of your unhappiness and marriage problems. Perhaps you can even give marriage counseling a try in order to find out if divorce really is the solution.
  • Do you have kids? Or an elderly person you have to care for? Are you financially stable enough to pay for bills when divorced? Can you afford legal fees? Are you willing to go through a child custody case? 

All in all, the final decision will come from you. Never let anyone else decide for you. Answer all the above-mentioned questions and sort out all your feelings and emotions. Make the choice that you feel and think is best for you.

Getting Help

If you think that divorce may be right for you but you are concerned about the legal and financial implications, talk to an experienced divorce or family law attorney who can give you advice on what the divorce process will mean for you.

Thinking About Divorce?
lawyer icon Get Legal Advice First. Talk to a Divorce Lawyer

Want to Learn More?
lawyer icon Check out Nolo's Family Law Resources

eBook - $22.99 | Book & eBook - $24.99

eBook - $32.99 | Book & eBook - $34.99

eGuide - $19.99

eBook - $32.99 | Book & eBook - $34.99

eBook - $22.99 | Book & eBook - $24.99


eForm - $29.99


LA-WS4:0.9.17.120208.12696+