Disadvantages to the Divorce Mediation Process

The divorce mediation process can be a great way to save money and to get to decide your own divorce settlement. Divorce mediation is used by couples who don't want to litigate their divorce in front of a judge but who are unable to work out a settlement totally on their own. The premise behind divorce mediation- which is a form of alternative dispute resolution- is that a trained and independent third party can facilitate communication to allow you to arrive at an agreement. While divorce mediation can be a great thing, there are some significant disadvantages to the divorce mediation, especially in certain situations.

Divorce Mediation Disadvantages

The disadvantages to divorce mediation are:

• The mediator isn't going to issue orders: In some cases, this is an advantage- after all, the point is you and your spouse want to work things out amongst yourselves. Unfortunately, sometimes that just cannot happen. If you two are deadlocked and really can't come to a consensus, the mediator is not going to tell you what to do- that isn't his job and it isn't within the bounds of mediation. So, you'll remain deadlocked and have to keep fighting it out- all the while paying for your mediators time and the litigators time.
• Mediation requires cooperation with your spouse. Because the mediator isn't going to make rulings or orders, its up to you two to make decisions together and to come to compromises. Unless both of you are willing to do this, mediation may not work to help you achieve a settlement and you might end up in court anyway, after you've spent time and money and incurred emotional anguish trying to go through mediation.
• Mediators won't compel information to be revealed. In divorce litigation, if one party is hiding assets, then the judge can compel him or her to reveal those assets and to be honest about his or her financial situation. If the person is not honest and doesn't share the accounts, then he can be held in contempt of court and even be sent to jail. Mediators don't have that power, which means that the person hiding assets has no compelling reason to be more honest and forthcoming.

Getting Help

If you are considering divorce mediation, then you should consult with an experienced divorce attorney. Your attorney can attend the mediation with you or help you to prepare for it, so that you can make sure that your rights are protected during the mediation and that you are effective at negotiating with your spouse.